It’s been a minute! You can all guess that going from 1 to 2 kiddos has changed my life in more ways than I could ever imagine. I don’t even remember what my life was like before I had kids. I have been writing this post for weeks, in between 4 am feedings no different than this one.
I’ve contemplated what this blog would turn into next. I poured my heart and soul into writing this in hopes it could aid in getting someone else through their journey of infertility and infant loss. It was an outlet for me to pour my emotions into – many things were written that I couldn’t speak to anyone. I find that many of us who struggled who now have our miracles have gone silent. It makes me sad – but I get it – a new journey has taken over.
So here is my update until I decide what will become of “road to babies.” I keep wondering if people really want to read about my life as a mom or will it fade into the background because it no longer fits the infertility spectrum? I just hope it helps another waiting mommy on their Napro journey or infertility journey.
My sons are now (almost) two and a half and 9 months. Mason is a feisty, but sweet boy with hazel eyes and curly red hair. He is talking like no other toddler I’ve ever met. He can throw a mean tantrum, loves snacks and shakees (smoothies), and Lion King. I think I’ve watched Mufasa die around 30 times in two weeks and my heart can no longer bare this. Miles is the easiest baby. He is crawling, just started on solids (which he isn’t a fan of), was my longest BF baby, and is a total mamas boy. His first word was of all things – mama.
Life at home hasn’t been the easiest. An 18 month age difference is enough to make all my hair fall out, but I wouldn’t want it any other way. There are days filled with tension, but always end with a smile on my face. I keep telling myself although it’s hard now – it has been SO worth it. I went from not being able to have kids to having two beautiful boys – and for that I am truly grateful to our Almighty Father.
We have found our groove here at home. Mason has been in school almost a year and will sadly be ending in May as we will take him out. We are juggling our finances and since I am a SAHM, it makes sense for Mason to stay home with me.
Oh – we are moving. We are actually downsizing, hah! Crazy but we decided to buy a tad smaller home with a pool – just because.
Are more children in our future? We will just have to wait and see. I had 4 back to back pregnancies, my body went through so much in 3 years, I want to give it a little break and focus on me and my health. I’ve been working hard on my well being both physically and emotionally. I know that I definitely want to have more children as I don’t feel our family is complete. If I could have it my way, I’d have two more, however my husband and I need a serious break and focus on raising these two beautiful boys for the next year or so before welcoming a 3rd child. I know in my heart it will happen. A lot of people keep saying “try for a girl,” but honestly, I just try for a healthy baby.
So there you have it. This is us. We aren’t perfect, but we are happy, healthy, and grateful. Until next time – whenever that may be.